on my mind: feb. 2019

home, literature, money, outdoors, thoughts

financial goals – I’ve reached a student debt balance where the interest accumulated each month is a negligible number, which means, once again, I’m waffling between cutting back my snowball or continuing on with it. On the one hand, I’d like to continue this intensity because I’d like to cut back my hours at my second job in the near future – or, at least, request some time off. On the other hand, I want to build my savings and open an IRA. I probably shouldn’t even bother to worry about this because I joined an investment app recently and have been throwing a little bit at it here and there. So, in reality, I’ve already negotiated a middle-ground with myself. 

screen time – I unintentionally cut back on my Netflix binges. I think I went almost a whole month without it, and I remembered why I don’t have regular cable or even a TV. I wouldn’t use it enough, and I get so much other stuff done when I’m not watching every new release and every new show. You know that conundrum where you sit down and don’t know what to choose out of the plethora of options? Last night, I watched a movie that has been in my list for close to a year. It was nice to put something on that I had been skipping over for a long time. I think the fact that I had cut back on my screen time helped me pick a movie more easily, and I ended up really liking it (Tallulah – if you care to know). 

health – Being at a desk all day has really messed with my health goals. I went from being active most of the day to being inactive until 5pm. I have had to cut my calories so much just to maintain weight. I have been making sure Charlie and I are walking regularly because after my knee surgery last year, Charlie gained a lot of weight too. The vet recommended he lose 10 pounds by his next yearly vaccination.  Basically, we are both pretty hangry most days, but he’s lost 6.8 lbs and looks so much better.  At least the creature I am in charge of is healthier even if I’m not. Unplugging from Netflix has helped me get more active in the evenings though. I realized I needed to make the most of our walks because I don’t have the time for each of us to get a long workout. I added walking lunges and sumo squats into our walks. Then I do a quick workout with either body weight or dumbbells and barbells. I recently bought a set of kettle-bells too and they have been a good addition to my at-home gym. 

creative juices -In addition to getting more exercise, cutting down my screen time has given me more time for personal projects like my blog, house projects, or painting.  I think I’m finally getting used to my perspective being read by people on the internet. For a long time, I didn’t want anyone to know about my blog. It wasn’t anonymous, I just didn’t share it. I’m finally growing into my voice – if that makes sense. When people give me feedback, I’m no longer embarrassed by it. Writing has become a big part of my life as of late and being able to unleash my worries and fears into words – plus share the other things I work on or make- has multiplied the motivation I have to do more. The act of summarizing the books I read or the projects I do inspires me to keep going. All of this, makes a creative like me happier in the grand scheme of things. The act of creating is the reward for me, not the comments or the amount of likes I get. 

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currently november 2018

money, thoughts

life currently (2)

Currently Reading: The Prestige by Christopher Priest. This one wasn’t on the list I posted a month ago. I was talking about how much I loved the movie version at the bar, and a customer said the book was incredible. He found his copy for me and let me borrow it. I finished First Fiction last week, and I was eager to start The Prestige. First Fiction was very good. I wish I was more familiar with some of the authors because I really enjoyed some of the stories. I tend to like short stories that are about mental health or stories that cast a curious light on seemingly average people or scenes. I listed some of my favorite stories here.

Currently Listening To: Use Me by The Goo Goo Dolls

Currently Watching: A Series of Unfortunate Events

Currently Loving: My Roomba and slow cooker. I listened to Jenna Kutcher’s podcast regularly for a few weeks, and something I kept hearing was that she “outsources” to get more done in her business and in her personal life. I’m the kind of person to do something for myself. I prefer to cook at home and fix things myself. While I don’t run my own business, I do work 56 hrs a week, and with the new position I accepted, I will be driving for 7.5 hrs a week. I think the Roomba and slow cooker are my little way of “outsourcing.” These two machines make life a little easier. BTW – I bought a certified refurbished Roomba using my “fun” money and I couldn’t be happier with it.

Currently Thankful For: A new opportunity at a stable company. It’s only temporary, but I feel good about it.

Currently Celebrating: Friends and family.

Currently Thinking: Christmas presents. I need to buy Christmas presents.

Currently Worrying: I need two new tires. Fun stuff.

Currently Hoping: The weather stays decent for driving to work.

Currently Considering: I lost my six month diet bet. I’m really disappointed, and I went through a phase where I wanted to be done looking at the scale. I want to do Keto for 21 days without any weighing myself or counting anything. I just want to add more protein and cut carbs blindly and see how I feel.

Currently Trying: I did two holiday craft shows in November, and I learned that if I could sell enough art to pay for the hobby, I would be happy. My mom and I are splitting a booth next Sunday, and I am hopeful that this show will be a little more lucrative.

Currently Painting: Poinsettias.

Currently Knitting: A beautiful ribbed scarf. I’m loving how the knit pattern looks.

To my friends and family that follow along, sorry for going silent for a month! My routine should be seeing a vast improvement now that I’m no longer at my old position.

❤ Hannah

 

 

I’m lonely, and that’s good because I’m still looking. I’m lonely and that’s good because I didn’t do something I regret. ‎I’m lonely, and that’s good because I’m working on myself. ‎I’m lonely, but I still love myself. ‎I’m lonely, but I’m still happy.

thoughts

learn to trust yourself

thoughts

trusting myself.png

While putting your laundry away, you were thinking about choices. Life is full of them. The choice you make every day is to live in this town. You like it here, but you don’t know if somewhere else could be better. You know that you’d miss your family, but you don’t know if things would go right for you just because you changed the scenery.

Maybe it takes participating in a talent show at your high school to realize that something is missing. You’ve been preoccupied with making the right decisions without recognizing how you arrived where you are today. You have been having trouble believing in yourself because you’ve been disappointed by yourself in the past. You have been doubting your decisions. You just don’t trust yourself to make the right ones.

You hadn’t really yet put into words why you get so uncomfortable when you think about high school (and now college). Now you understand that the high school campus reminds you of the potential you had, and college reminds you of the anxiety and doubt that worstened while you were there. You don’t know why you didn’t acknowledge it before this, but your misconceptions have destroyed the pride you once had in your accomplishments. Now you constantly worry whether you should be changing the status quo or staying with this path. You can’t decide what your passion is and whether or not that even matters for a career.

There are a couple people in your life who truly believe that you can do anything you want. They want you to do what you love and be successful emotionally and financially. There are also those who want you to be rational and traditional about your career. A couple of them have given up on themselves a little bit. Show them all that it’s about hard work and a good attitude. Rebuild your self-confidence and learn to trust yourself again. Today is a new day.

Write down your goals.

Put your goals first.

Make this day better than the last.

Most importantly, understand this, in order for you to find happiness where you are, no matter where that is, you have to be happy with yourself. Stop letting your attitude beat down your goals. Even if they don’t appear to be amazing, life-changing plans, they are your jumping off point. Make sure that you keep moving forward, and only look back to glean something helpful. Don’t look back for too long. Remember, tomorrow is when it gets even more interesting.

book review: maybe in another life

literature
Maybe in Another Life

Maybe in Another Life by Taylor Jenkins Reid

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Okay Taylor Jenkins Reid, I hear you. Did you have to drive it in so forefully? Here I am, a lost and confused millennial with student loans to pay and life decisions to make, and you waltz in and tell me that it’s all going to be alright. How dare you?

This book was crafted perfectly for someone like me. The side by side comparison of two parallel lives both freaked me out and inspired me. I think that every decision I make alters my life forever and that worries me because I get stuck trying to make the right decision. Then I end up 29, like Hannah Martin, hopping from place to place thinking I have made all the wrong decisions.

I don’t have all the answers from reading this novel, but that is kind of the point. No one knows whether their choices are the right choices. The idea is to make a choice and stick to it and surround yourself with people that love you.

It seems so damn easy! Hannah’s story shows us that it isn’t.

The thing about these two universes is that the characters learn similar lessons but in different ways. I found the character development fascinating. Both Hannah and Gabbi discovered things about themselves and their lives through different means and at different paces. It was wild.

I listened to the audible version of this book. I have to say the narrator did quite well but I thought her male characters came across as weak. I had to reimagine their voices to give them more personality.

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